A Best Friend Can Creep Up on You
I bought a 1995 Jeep Wrangler last May. I’ve wanted a Jeep since the age of 11. The same time that I determined I wanted to be a journalist.
I managed to become a journalist back in the early 1990s, when I worked as a Page One daily newspaper editor for a now defunct chain of papers owned by Knight-Ridder. It was a great job - so fun to do the thing you dreamt of since you were wee.
But that dang car. That's another thing. As much as I love it’s rattly rat-trap-ness, it has been an albatross. I’ve put in a serpentine belt. That cost a few hundred dollars.
A couple of months later, I had the serpentine belt pulleys shear off on one of the coldest days of the year while in bumper to bumper traffic in the last snowstorm of the year.
Now I’m on to a wrecked transfer case, crap rear-end, and the need for back brakes. All after my younger brother offered to install – and did install - front brakes to get rid of the brake-noise in the front end. Which turned out to be the transfer case, back brakes and rear end.
You see where this is going, right?
Even though I love the Jeep, it’s loud. Rattly. And it’s a disaster. Probably I should use this forum to grouse about that heap. The heap I need to sink 2-grand into. But that’s not really the point.
It's easy to get glimmers once in a while of something unexpected happening in someone you love. But when do you really SEE it? Life seen in slices is hard to piece together.
For me, the answer to when I saw him as a trusted advisor is “I didn't. It creeped up on me.”
It all came together today, when we had lunch after a presentation I did on Social Media for the Minnesota Clerks and Finance Officers. I gave my brother a gift card to REI as a “thank you.” He didn’t want to take it.
But this interaction didn't drive it home. It started this summer when my youngest nephew had a complex surgery to help him better walk. The kiddo has Cerebral Palsy.
My brother and his wife spent 6 weeks at the hospital during their son’s recovery. I visited a lot, and watched my brother encourage his son, hug my sister-in-law and interact with other parents at the hospital.
Publicly, he never wavered in his support of his son. He never let any sorrow or frustration show.
That’s when I started to realize my brother is someone I’m fortunate to have in my life.
And even better, fortunate to have as my brother.
My little brother is becoming a best friend. He might not know it. And he might not want it. But for me, he's a blessing
I’m looking forward to the chance this might happen with our other, even younger brother- who, by the way, is on his way via a completely different route.
I managed to become a journalist back in the early 1990s, when I worked as a Page One daily newspaper editor for a now defunct chain of papers owned by Knight-Ridder. It was a great job - so fun to do the thing you dreamt of since you were wee.
But that dang car. That's another thing. As much as I love it’s rattly rat-trap-ness, it has been an albatross. I’ve put in a serpentine belt. That cost a few hundred dollars.
A couple of months later, I had the serpentine belt pulleys shear off on one of the coldest days of the year while in bumper to bumper traffic in the last snowstorm of the year.
Now I’m on to a wrecked transfer case, crap rear-end, and the need for back brakes. All after my younger brother offered to install – and did install - front brakes to get rid of the brake-noise in the front end. Which turned out to be the transfer case, back brakes and rear end.
You see where this is going, right?
Even though I love the Jeep, it’s loud. Rattly. And it’s a disaster. Probably I should use this forum to grouse about that heap. The heap I need to sink 2-grand into. But that’s not really the point.
Little brother becomes safe harbor
Instead, the point is that through this weird experience my little brother has become someone or something I never expected – a trusted advisor, a safe harbor. I always knew he was a good kid, but I didn’t quite realize that the good kid grew into a wonderful man. And an unparalleled brother.It's easy to get glimmers once in a while of something unexpected happening in someone you love. But when do you really SEE it? Life seen in slices is hard to piece together.
For me, the answer to when I saw him as a trusted advisor is “I didn't. It creeped up on me.”
It all came together today, when we had lunch after a presentation I did on Social Media for the Minnesota Clerks and Finance Officers. I gave my brother a gift card to REI as a “thank you.” He didn’t want to take it.
But this interaction didn't drive it home. It started this summer when my youngest nephew had a complex surgery to help him better walk. The kiddo has Cerebral Palsy.
My brother and his wife spent 6 weeks at the hospital during their son’s recovery. I visited a lot, and watched my brother encourage his son, hug my sister-in-law and interact with other parents at the hospital.
Publicly, he never wavered in his support of his son. He never let any sorrow or frustration show.
That’s when I started to realize my brother is someone I’m fortunate to have in my life.
And even better, fortunate to have as my brother.
The gift of growing up and older
When you’re young, you don’t realize that the kid brother you pick on will be such a neat adult. You don’t realize that when you’re in 10th grade, and he’s in 8th grade, and he’s finally strong enough to punish you (by sitting on your head and dealing you an incapacitating passing of gas) that you actually will choose to hang out with him when you are an adult. Or that you'll be sad when you learn he has other plans for his weekend than those you proposed.My little brother is becoming a best friend. He might not know it. And he might not want it. But for me, he's a blessing
I’m looking forward to the chance this might happen with our other, even younger brother- who, by the way, is on his way via a completely different route.
Comments